The business owners I work with have big hearts. They care about people. They care about their work. It’s not difficult for me to see their heart and I love them because of it. I respect them because of it.
But they’ve got a hard edge. They’re firm and they’re in charge. They sometimes have a short fuse. They have high expectations for themselves and those around them. And they judge everyone around these expectations.
In order to protect their heart they project power. One owner told me he learned early that he had to be a tough guy – often the toughest guy – in order to survive. He was just beginning to see that being the tough guy had become a huge block to achieving the high level of success he had always dreamed of.
I appreciate that seeing. It’s often true that the patterns we adopted as kids have led us to where we are today.
Trouble is, as kids, we may have been very clever about developing coping strategies, but we couldn’t know how those strategies would play through our life. It may have looked like they worked to get us through our younger years, but they left scars from not dealing face-up with the problems and trauma we faced then. And they left us with patterns that keep landing us in the same trouble over and over again as adults.
Being able to control our environment and get people to do what we wanted may have gotten us through starting and running a successful small business. But it’s surely going to thwart the kind of growth that requires developing a powerful team and giving them space to fail.
I help business owners put their finger on these old ways – to see where they first appeared and why we adopted them. I help them understand how their patterns played out and both supported and blocked what was important in their life.
And I facilitate their healing to help them see these patterns and begin breaking free of them. Like any shaman, I nurture a bag of tools to work this magic. I also help owners create a space for something new to emerge – something that’s been there all along, I support them as they step into a new level of success.
Mostly, this is about demonstrating ways their heart must come forward and get into the game without them feeling weak or overly fearful about losing control. Their big heart is the key to their big power – and their passion. We’ve got to free their heart to lead them into the great work they were always meant to do. Their lives and the lives of the many people they touch depend on it!